A few months ago a friend from high school DMed me on Facebook. I was happy and excited that she did. I have two kids; a toddler and a four year-old and I'm busy with them but making mom friends is really hard.
She only lives one town over and I got excited because her kids are around the same age as mine. She asked me about how life was going and I couldn't help but vent to her. We got really close over a week and texted and messaged several times a day.
She sells makeup through a company and has posted about her business on Facebook a lot. I never bounced back after my second child and had been wanting to put more effort into my appearance so this appealed to me. She made running a makeup business look so fun.
I wanted something that was all mine and wanted to do something fun with my friend, so I signed up. I didn't know all of the details. The same week, I had a Zoom call with the woman who signed her up who let me know I had to buy $200 in product every six months to "stay active" which isn't so bad. But to really make money I need to sign people up. She recommended that I message, call, and text people I know.
Now on top of feeling like my friend only messaged me to sign me up, I feel awful about having a new built-in bill and I do not want to start harassing my family about makeup.
What's the best way to get out of this without losing my friend?
-Regretful in MD
Dear Regretful,
You are NOT the first person to be contacted out of the blue by someone you used to know about an MLM. You're also not the first person to be tangled up in a friendship/recruitment. It's honestly super manipulative. I'm not saying there is no way she wanted to be friends with you, but she most likely was looking for someone to recruit as well.
I'd talk to her openly and ask her. "Did you only contact me to have me join your business?"
If you search on Reddit, you'll see many have the same story.
Next, ask yourself: are these products truly superior to the ones I'd buy elsewhere? If so, buy them if it's in your budget. But having a mandatory quota isn't something I'd be interested. A lot of MLMs have nice products, but I choose not to indulge because of their practices. There are always alternatives that are just as great, tbh.
You don't have to stay in the MLM. If the friendship is real, it'll survive you quitting.
Being desperate for connection can lead people to make decisions they wouldn't normally make. Is there a mom group in your area? Through a church or your city? Check your community's website. Ask around. Find out if there are any Mommy & Me music, art classes. Little Gym is also a great place to meet moms if they operate in your area.
You can have friendship feeling like you're being used. You deserve much better than that.
Email your work-at-home related questions to WAHMCLUBMail@Gmail.com (you'll be kept anonymous)
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